Healthy Fear

So, I talked to my coach, Chris Bowers, yesterday about some fears and worries I have about this Ironman. I have never been scared of a race. I usually do really well going into them. I even do fine going into something new. No huge fears on the long century rides or other tri's I have done although they were very tough! I still didn't worry about those like I am about this Ironman. Scared I won't finish, scared my body will give out, scared I have told too many people and now if something happens I will be a failure.  But as he talked to me, I began to realize and understand first, that it is good to have a healthy fear of this race. It is a big deal. It is tough! However, once we talked about specifics and cut off times he made me realize that I can do this even in a worst case senerio. I also realized that this is about more than just crossing a finish line. Each week that comes and goes I am seeing that this is not just a physical journey but a spiritual one as well. I am learning more about myself. I am learning how not to just rely on myself but to trust God, trust my training and trust my coach. I guess I am also learning that I am a little bit of a control freak:) Last night I got back in the pool and had a great 2,000 yard swim! 1,000 warm up and 1,000 best effort. My best effort came in at 17:57! I feel good about that time. Coach says it was a good swim too! Anyway, I have a long way to go before I conquer all of these things I am working on but I will get there. One day at a time...mile by mile!